|August 18, 2015
Clint Eastwood's advice in "Dirty Harry" that
opinions, like certain body parts, are best kept to
man isn't feeling well, so he goes to the doc for a checkup.
The doctor runs a bunch of tests, has the guy sit down in
his office and says to him "I've got bad news,
you've got rabies, and you only have a few days to live".
The guy asks the doctor for a paper and pencil, and
starts writing like crazy. "Are you making out your
will? the doc asks. "No," says the
man, as he continues to write furiously, "I'm
making a list of the people I'm going to bite".
reminded me of this story recently, it got me thinking about
my own end of life, and I decided that when I go, it would
only be right to take a few people with me.
of course, is not going to happen, but I entertained myself
putting together a list of prospective fellow passengers on
that last flight to the great beyond:
- That guy I know who is always telling people that "he'll
pray for them". Telling someone that you'll pray
for them is basically saying you're not planning on
doing anything to actually help.
- The next store clerk who asks me if I'd like to
donate to their new pet charity. Everybody has a cause.
- The two kids on bikes, wearing short sleeve dress
shirts with name tags, who ring your doorbell and try to
convince you to become a Mormon.
- The next anybody who rings my doorbell and tries to
convince me to do or buy anything.
- The local cop who hides down the street with his
radar gun on the last day of the month, trying to make
- Any politician who thinks it is ok to take money from
the 49% who pay all the income taxes and give it to the
51% who pay no income taxes at all. Oh wait, that would
be all of them.
- And, for sure, I'll be reaching up to strangle the
hospital chaplain if he starts that "Yea,
though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death"
thing, a guaranteed way to scare patients to death,
finishing them off right then and there.
I'll bet you have a few ideas to add to this
list, send me an email.
Air Aviation Referral Service
responses, and will be glad to post them here. Email your
|You forgot the Jehovah's Witnesses, who, if you EVER
let your responses to them sound even vaguely warm, will
never stop trying again, ever.
Cute article, but I wouldn't want to
spend my after life traveling with those dopes. -
Sarah in Washington, DC
Ron says: I wasn't
planning on taking the same plane.
It might surprise
you to read that I also don't like the phrase "pray for"
someone. The implication is that I want for them what they
want, but they might not know what's best. Maybe it's best
that someone who's very sick should die.
Jeanette in Minnesota